I Think I'm a Hopeless Case

Let's see, what ailment is it I worry I have this
morning? Well, I cut my finger when I was working
in the yard yesterday, and rather than come inside
and wash it out and off, clean it with peroxide,
put some neosporin on it and a bandage, I decided
just to let it bleed and go on working. Which I did.
When I came in, I washed it thoroughly with soapy
water, cleaned it out with alcohol (out of peroxide),
and that was that. I decided to just forego my neosporin
and bandage. So, I'm sitting here this morning on the
computer looking up bland diets for my ulcer (which
I assume I have based on the pain in my stomach
and the blood in my mouth), when I notice my finger.
It's red and there's a red streak coming down from the
site of the wound. So, now I am thinking, Well, that's
just great. Now you can add cellulitis to the list of things
wrong with you.

Oh my. This is so taxing. Why am I this way?

Once again, there were no comments on my other blog.
I thought someone would wonder where I was. I haven't
posted in over two weeks. For over 10 years of my life,
I have been an active user of the internet. There are
people I know only through their comments on my poetry
at Melic and from their comments on my blog, but I thought
I mattered. Silly goose that I am.

I came to the internet in my loneliness and need to connect
with others with similar interests. I knew no one here
remotely interested in talking shop about poetry, music,
wine, etc. I had good friends at that time, but they didn't
live here, and they had no real interest in poetry. So,
I ventured out and connected. For years there has been
correspondence with these people. I feel that I know them.
If one of them was MIA (and some of them have been that
way from time to time), I would just post a note and say
Hey, you ok? I've done that. And many others who follow
their blogs do that. But not one person has left a note on
my blog.

So, let's see: not missed, possible cellulitis, likely ulcer,
possible heart problems, very likely high blood pressure
(will find out Tuesday--have to go see my doc if I want
my anxiolytic refilled), possible tumor in my lymph node,
possible ovarian cancer, sleep apnea, possible deviated
septum. There are more things to add to the list, but
that's a place to start.

Sicko. That's me. Weirdo. Loser.